“Ugh, usually when you see an old dude slobber that much, he has a nurse with him.”
“So let me get this straight. You have evidence—shocking evidence—that would totally exonerate you. But you’re not going to go to court because it will hurt your kids?”
“Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, some more shame. Fool me three times, you really gotta do a better job of fooling me. Four times, we’re extending your contract.”
“I mean, what kind of terrible people would push a political agenda the day after a mass shooting?”
Cue the Fox News clips.
“How can you forget sending someone your bits and pieces?”
Possible new slogan: “CNN for your crazy uncle”
“To not acknowledge the gravity of this Comey memo, you’d have to be willfully ignorant. Aggressively ignorant. In fact, you’d have to be Fox News.”