“That guy should rot in hell.”
“I was just thinking to myself this morning, ‘I would love to relive that magical election of 2016.’”
“Hey, Hillary Clinton, don’t blame Bernie because Donald Trump called you names. I promise you he was going to do that anyway.”
“Just like that, Bernie’s 2016 run was over… There were so many white women crying, I thought Pinterest had died.”
"You know how you have that crazy uncle you only see at Thanksgiving? Well this country is about 48 percent crazy uncles, and it's about to be Thanksgiving all day, everyday."
"I'm sorry, is this Hillary's plan to woo angry Bernie voters? First, she overlooked progressive VP choices and chose insider Tim Kaine...And then she added Wasserman Schultz to her team, despite her anti-Bernie sentiments. What's next? I'm impressed she didn't pants Bernie during his speech tonight."
"Finally, a chance for Hillary to prove to the Bernie delegates that she is not a puppet of the big banks. And what better place than the Wells Fargo Arena!"