Stephen tries to ignore Trump and talk about Clinton, Carson, and Jeb Buszzzzz

late show jeb stephen colbert
Still from CBS

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On Wednesday’s Late Show, Stephen Colbert tried to talk about anything other than Donald Trump. After Trump announced earlier this week that he would seek to ban all Muslims from entering the country, every pundit and anchor began to once again talk about him. “It’s his entire electoral strategy. Trump says something shocking, then all of us on TV spend days repeating it, giving him millions of dollars of free airtime. So, I would rather not give him more of it,” says Stephen, before choosing to talk about Hillary Clinton instead. Hillary has been in hiding lately because she has a huge lead in the polls and is not willing to risk her lead “by doing something crazy like go out in public.” With Hillary AWOL, Stephen is tempted to talk about Trump, but he tries to talk about other candidates first, like Ben Carson, who cannot pronounce Hamas. “It’s true, hummus does rule the Gaza Strip. And frankly we all falafel about it, and the efforts to fix it have been pita-ful. No wonder they dominate the baba ga-news cycle. So, if I can offer just a tahini bit of perspective here. I believe America cannot take our security for pomegranate, because terrorism is a bigger threat than global schawarming, and if you think this situation is just gonna go away, you’re couscous.”

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