Stephen Colbert would raise baby Hitler as his own

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On Tuesday’s Late Show, Stephen Colbert discussed the importance of time travel to the Republican candidates. Jeb Bush recently said, if given the chance to go back in time to kill baby Hitler, “Hell yeah, I would!” Colbert says this is Politics 101: “Shake the hand; kiss the baby; kill baby Hitler.” Colbert sees this time travel question as a crucial issue that should be debated by the candidates, because when time travel technology becomes available, we will want a trustworthy leader “at the helm of Time Force One.” We cannot have a president who would waste it on “taking Jesus on a pterodactyl ride,” despite how fun that sounds.

Colbert reminds us that Ben Carson said he would give guns to the Jews in Nazi Germany. “Of course, Ben Carson wouldn’t kill Hitler himself,” Colbert reasons. “As a doctor, he swore: first, do no harm; second, give everyone guns.” Colbert then tells what he would do if given the chance to go back to baby Hitler’s time. Watch the video to see his solution.


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