‘The Daily Show’ reports on Paul Ryan’s list of House speaker demands

daily show trevor noah paul ryan
Still from Comedy Central

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Trevor Noah talked a lot about Paul Ryan’s butt on last night’s The Daily Show, but he also mentioned that the congressman may run for Speaker of the House. After John Boehner announced his retirement, Congress has been up in arms about who would replace him, but nobody wants the job, including Paul Ryan. Trevor asks why he changed his mind, and a clip shows Ryan imagining his kids one day asking him the same question. “You really think this is what your kids are going to be asking you in the future?” Trevor asks. “And what’s your reply? ‘What can I say kids? Back in 2015 I really thought the future hinged on who would be House speaker, not the fight against climate change. Now get your scuba gear on and come down to dinner.”

Ryan knows the Republicans need him to step up, so he has given a long list of demands, including that every Republican will be behind him, that changes be made on how the party can fire the speaker, and that he won’t be forced to give up his family time. Trevor is impressed to see Paul Ryan “going H.A.M.” and goes to Jessica Williams for more on the list. It turns out, according to Williams, that Ryan also wants a host of other things, including a protein shake fountain, a family set of Segways, and to be on the cover of every issue of Men’s Health. Watch the video for more of his long list of demands.

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